I recently had a great interview with Merianne Drew and we talked all about creating peace in your relationship!
Check out the transcript of the episode below– I’m so glad you’re here!
Also, if you’d like to watch it on YouTube instead, click here.
If you’d like to listen on Apple Podcasts, click here.
And on Spotify, you can click here.
Do you ever feel like no matter how hard you try, the same relationship challenges keep showing up? This episode is for you. I’m joined by Merianne Drew who’s a holistic nutritionist, life coach, and relationship expert. She brings incredible wisdom (and a lot of honesty) to the table about what it really takes to build healthier, stronger connections.
We talk about the often-overlooked link between your physical health and your relationship struggles. Merianne unpacks why communication can be so tough, how to get to the root of the issue, and the small, practical shifts that can completely transform your day-to-day interactions.
If you’re navigating emotional triggers, learning to set boundaries, or figuring out how to reconnect after years of distractions, this conversation offers real, actionable insights.
Create the relationships, and the life, you deserve!
Foundations of Relationship Challenges
Karen: “Today, we’re focusing on relationships within couples. From what I see in my practice, communication is a significant challenge. What do you think are some of the most common root causes?”
Merianne: “Oh, I can talk about this for hours. Many people search for strategies without addressing the root causes. For instance, a client of mine had read books, attended therapy, and taken courses, yet he struggled to implement strategies because he hadn’t slept well in 10 years. Without addressing his sleep, he couldn’t regulate his emotions or access the strategies he’d learned.”
Karen: “That’s such a great point. Physical health often gets overlooked in relationship dynamics.”
Merianne: “Exactly. When we’re physically unwell—whether it’s poor sleep, inadequate nutrition, or lack of exercise—our relationships suffer. Physical health is foundational. In my case, when my relationship went through a crisis, I was the sickest I’ve ever been. Once we addressed the root issues in our relationship, my health improved almost instantly.”
Karen: “I’m so glad you said that. People often don’t think of nutrition or physical health when talking about relationship challenges. It’s always about communication or compatibility.”
Merianne: “Right. And the connection goes both ways. During the hardest times in my relationship, I’d ignored how much emotional stress had manifested physically. It was a wake-up call when improving our relationship helped heal my chronic health issues.”
The Interplay of Stress and Relationships
Karen: “It’s fascinating how much stress impacts physical health and vice versa. When we’re constantly in fight or flight mode, our communication breaks down.”
Merianne: “Absolutely. Poor emotion regulation is a huge barrier to effective communication. When triggered, we operate from our limbic system—our fight or flight mode—instead of our rational brain. This creates irrational thoughts and regrettable actions.”
Karen: “Taking a deep breath can signal safety to our nervous system. But many people don’t even realize they’re stuck in fight or flight mode. How can they identify this?”
Merianne: “If stress feels like the air you breathe, you won’t recognize it until you create contrast. Daily rituals, like gratitude journaling or exercising, help cultivate positive emotions. When negativity arises, you’ll notice the difference and realize you’ve lost your peace.”
Karen: “That’s so insightful. It’s amazing how these small rituals can act as anchors.”
Merianne: “Exactly. For example, starting your day with one loving act toward yourself—whether it’s a nutritious breakfast, a quiet moment, or writing down gratitude—builds resilience. Contrast helps you notice when things feel off.”
Karen: “And once you notice, you can take steps to address it.”
Building New Patterns and Courage
Karen: “Once people identify their triggers, how can they start creating new patterns?”
Merianne: “Start small. For example, waking up 10 minutes earlier to set an intention for the day can create a sense of control. Repetition builds habits. It’s not about motivation; it’s about consistency.”
Karen: “It’s true. I remember starting the 5 AM club. It wasn’t easy, but over time, it became a habit.”
Merianne: “Exactly. Courage also plays a role. Whether it’s addressing relationship issues or pursuing personal growth, small risks build resilience. One of my clients, a first-time business owner, developed courage through leadership, which translated into her personal relationships.”
Karen: “Courage is such a powerful word. It’s not always easy to muster up.”
Merianne: “No, but it can be built. Feeling fear and taking action anyway creates a positive feedback loop.”
Karen: “It’s fascinating how small actions can snowball into significant changes.”
Merianne: “Absolutely. And those small actions create new neuropathways, which reinforce positive behaviors over time.”
Effective Communication and Boundaries
Karen: “Communication is another major challenge. What’s your advice on navigating difficult conversations?”
Merianne: “Sometimes, the most effective response is silence. If someone’s triggered, they’re not in a place to process language. Standing in presence without reacting can be incredibly powerful. Similarly, boundaries must be reinforced with action, not just words. For example, if a partner doesn’t honor a boundary, you have to follow through with the consequences you outlined.”
Karen: “That’s such a valuable insight. It’s easy to feel guilty about enforcing boundaries, but it’s crucial for healthy relationships.”
Merianne: “Exactly. Boundaries without follow-through are ineffective. Courage is required to act on them, especially when faced with resistance.”
Karen: “What if someone struggles to maintain those boundaries?”
Merianne: “It’s about self-respect. When you value yourself, enforcing boundaries becomes non-negotiable.”
Rebuilding After Crisis
Karen: “Many couples struggle after major transitions, like kids leaving home. How can they reconnect?”
Merianne: “Redefine your identity and purpose. Raising kids is an adventure, but once that’s over, couples need a new shared goal. Exploring individual and joint dreams can bring excitement back into the relationship.”
Karen: “I love that idea of creating a new adventure. It shifts the focus from loss to opportunity.”
Merianne: “Exactly. And rebuilding trust after a crisis requires patience and courage. It’s about showing up one day at a time and being open to the possibility of change.”
Karen: “Rebuilding can feel like starting over. How do you maintain hope during the process?”
Merianne: “By recognizing progress and celebrating small wins. Trust builds slowly, and that’s okay.”
Karen: “It sounds like celebrating those moments can be really empowering.”
Merianne: “It is. It keeps you focused on growth instead of setbacks.”
Fostering Self-Love for Relationship Growth
Karen: “Many people struggle with self-love. How does that affect relationships?”
Merianne: “Profoundly. If you don’t love yourself, you can’t show up fully in a relationship. Self-love includes respecting your boundaries and meeting your needs.”
Karen: “What’s one simple way to cultivate self-love?”
Merianne: “Start with small acts of kindness toward yourself. For example, feed yourself when you’re hungry or rest when you’re tired. Over time, these small acts build self-respect.”
Karen: “It sounds so simple, but it can make such a difference.”
Building Resilience and Facing Challenges
Karen: “What about those who find it hard to change old patterns?”
Merianne: “Change can feel overwhelming, but it starts with one step. Even tiny actions, like journaling your emotions or saying one positive affirmation, can disrupt old patterns.”
Karen: “And how does that build resilience?”
Merianne: “By proving to yourself that you can take action despite discomfort. Resilience grows when you face challenges and overcome them incrementally.”
If you’re looking to dive deeper into these insights, visit Merianne Drew’s website at meriannedrew.com to schedule a free discovery call and explore how her holistic approach can transform your relationships.
Thanks for reading! Create the life you love, one day at a time!
