You never take time for yourself
You never take time for yourself because of whatever story you’re telling yourself. You don’t have time, you are too stressed, you have too many responsibilities, you can’t take a break because you will get behind, etc.
This mentality will crush your dreams. Thinking that the reason why you can’t do _________ because of some reason outside of yourself, is just not the truth. One of the reasons why I started my podcast was to tell the stories of others who have come from broken homes, poverty, horrible circumstances, abuse, and betrayal and have created amazing lives. Not in spite of their circumstances, but BECAUSE of them. They used their horrendous beginnings as fuel to create better versions of themselves, and in some cases, to prove wrong everyone who told them they would be nothing and nobody.
It doesn’t happen automatically. Hypnotherapy only works when you take time for yourself every day. In the session, we unravel the root cause of your suffering, bad habits, bad thoughts, or symptoms, and then it’s up to you to listen to your recording every day for 4 weeks. That’s when the new neuro-pathways are solidified. The recording is your new transformed beliefs, and it takes time to listen and rewire your brain so it doesn’t take the same path that it has been taking for most of your life.
You have a fixed mindset and you want everything to stay the same forever.
If you don’t want change, then hypnotherapy is not for you. Hypnotherapy and specifically RTT helps you get out of the same patterns of thought. It changes the patterns of what you think and believe, which changes everything. Once your thoughts and beliefs are transformed, you aren’t the same person anymore. So hypnotherapy is not for you if you want to stay the same.
You ignore your intuition and pretend everything’s fine when you know it’s not.
I spent decades pretending everything was fine. Trying to be perfect. Thinking that I had to earn my worth by pleasing others and being a martyr. I would suffer in silence. Maybe tell a girl friend or two, maybe just cry alone in the shower. But I’d never tell the person who hurt me. I’d never be honest with myself. I knew I wasn’t happy but I wasn’t willing to speak my feelings out loud. I held it in and created more and more resentment until I exploded over nothing. But here’s what I know now. Speaking my feelings when I know they can potentially hurt someone else’s feelings is uncomfortable for me. And, if I don’t do it, I cause my own suffering to multiply, and nothing gets better. If we don’t speak our feelings out loud, we make ourselves physically and mentally sick. Doing the things that are uncomfortable is the only way to A) make it more comfortable and familiar, and B) get the shit circus out of my brain and out of my body. I immediately feel more relaxed. It’s no longer in my brain doing a UFC battle. It’s gone. Now you can work on solutions. It’s the only way to grow. Until you’re willing to look yourself in the mirror and say, “I am not fine,” then you’re not ready for hypnotherapy. You have to be honest to say that you’re really not fine and you would like to feel better.
You can’t sit still
Oh, the busybody syndrome! Just kidding, it’s not a real syndrome. I had that! The feeling that if you just keep moving and take any action, even if it’s sorting your DVD collection (bad example…I don’t even have a DVD player, much less any DVDs, but you know what I mean) then you can out-do your problems. If you just keep busy enough then problems will go away. Now, I agree (and it’s proven) that making progress toward a goal helps you feel better because when you make a small accomplishment, your brain releases dopamine. More dopamine than when you accomplish the goal, as it turns out. But just keeping busy doing things that don’t move you closer to your goal and never sitting still, never being in the present moment and always thinking of the next thing on your to-do list will just cause you more stress. Being still, even for just a few minutes, slows down your fight-or-flight response (your adrenal system). Your adrenals can only last so long. When they fail, it causes a long list of physical health problems. So awareness is key. Just noticing that you can’t sit still is a good start. I see you. I have the same tendency. But making time to sit, listen, and be still is key to healing and transforming. Sometimes the things we resist most are the things we need to do the most.
You avoid problems and you’re hoping that if you wait it out, your problems will disappear.
At times I wish this were true, that if we ignore and avoid, problems will disappear, but, alas, it has never been the case. Ignoring or avoiding challenges doesn’t make them go away. 
The only way to learn and grow is to acknowledge the problem or situation and address it directly, no matter how uncomfortable it is. One of the best things I’ve discovered by hiring a hypnotherapist for myself is the calming effect it has on me. Understanding the root cause of my issues allowed me to let them go. It’s harder, though not impossible, to let go of the past if you’d don’t take the time to understand it. And while you’re in that calm state of hypnosis, and the conscious mind is asleep, you’re able to understand why you’re having certain challenges, and then you’re able to let it go and transform. Sometimes it only takes one session, although my recommendation is three sessions since most of us have a few issues we’d like to address and it’s best to work on one at a time. One of my clients was having physical symptoms because she had been divorced for nearly two years, and she had just started dating again. She was waking up every night with paralyzing anxiety and was experiencing diarrhea. In one session, she understood where her anxiety came from, was able to release her old limiting beliefs, and completely transformed. When I checked in on her a week later, she said all of her symptoms were gone, and she said it’s, “like all walls crashed and I’m totally in the love bubble.”
You never ask for help and do everything on your own.
Some of us never want to ask for help because we don’t want to appear weak or inferior. We have a desperate need to hold tight to the belief that we “have it all together.” Again, I’m speaking from personal experience. I also never wanted to ask for help because I didn’t want to burden anyone else. One of the gifts of my divorce long ago was that I absolutely had to ask for help. I couldn’t do it on my own even if I wanted to. I learned that people who you love would love to help you.
I heard the quote,
and it stopped me in my tracks. Who am I to deny someone the opportunity to help and serve and feel good? I love to help people, and I know how good it feels. So, I stopped trying to be a one-man band long ago. Everyone needs help. Everyone. You know that saying “self-made millionaire”. It’s false. How many millionaires have zero partners? How many have zero employees, zero lawyers, zero accountants, zero customers? You got it. ZERO of them. There’s no such thing as a self-made anything. We can’t accomplish any of our dreams without other humans. And we need each other through all kinds of stages in life.
I love what I do. I am here to serve anyone who would like a little bit of help overcoming whatever it is that you need a little help with. We all do. and It’s OK to admit, and it’s ok to allow others the opportunity to serve.
Thanks for being here and thanks for reading!
Let’s be friends on social media! Follow me on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube!
